6.19.2012

CJ Top 5: Worst Movie Ever



My Top 5 here is a tricky one. I love watching movies since I can't remember. It's a passion... but ever since I took film classes, I now can tell a good movie from a bad one. Movie directors can be stupid when it comes to script, action and visual. Bad movie directors concentrate on one of those things, and one thing only, which makes the movie so horrible, I want to throw myself off a bridge (not literally). A good movie needs all of those things, and more. Again, this list is based on movies I saw. If in this world, there are worst movies then the one stated below, I'm sorry: I will go to the video store and rent them to create a new list.
Anyway, here's my CJ Top 5: Worst Movie Ever.


5. Munich
Now, if someone comes to me and say that it was the best movie they ever saw, I shall punch this someone in the face twice and say "It's 2 hours and 44 minutes!" I watched this movie when I was around 12 years old, I thought it was TOO LONG. I lost interest in the film halfway through and I daydreamed for the last half of the movie. Steven, you disappointed me. Even thought the subject of the movie was interesting, I thought it was boring... sorry! This movie is my earliest memory of a bad movie. I might watch it again and maybe change my mind.


4. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
I was tempted to make this movie my number one, but my Harry Potter BOOKS' fan in me changed her mind. This movie... is probably the worst book adaptation in the history of cinema. My film and culture teacher told me that even thought a movie is boring, or terrible, we should be able to appreciate it. I REALLY tried to appreciate it, but sorry David Yates, but your movie sucks... a lot. The dialogues are weak, weak, weak. The acting doesn't help either. But what pisses me off the most, is that it's the longest book... but the shortest movie in all the seven Harry Potters (for me the seventh and eighth movie are one movie). I tried to watch it and I told myself every time I was going to watch it "Maybe I was too critical... maybe this time it's gonna be good." I always end up watching half of the movie and blame myself for believing that this movie can be good. It's not.
Note for future me: don't watch it.


3. Captain America: The First Avenger
I love superhero movies... but ever since I saw this one, I don't think I do anymore. This movie was so... unrealistic, that I was sad after watching it. It's Captain America for Christ's sake! Yes, when I said (wrote) unrealistic, it's my way to say that there were some moments too darn impossible, it was ridiculous. Let me explain myself: for example, towards the end of the movie, Capt' needs to get on an airplane, which is ready for take-off (AT A GREAT AMOUNT OF SPEED). He's on a jeep, with a guy (I don't recall who) and the girl he's being in love with since he first saw her (cliché). He's about to jump on the plane (still going at I-don't-know-what-speed-but-it's-going-super-fast) and the girl takes his arm... and KISSES him! Wow... what a romantic moment (not). 
That's all I have to say... Joe Johnston, you just destroyed my father's favorite superhero. 


2. Twilight
You saw that one coming somewhere in the Top 5 didn't you? Yes, Twilight is there. There's so many things wrong with this movie, that I cannot say what is wrong with it. The acting? The special effects? The dialogue (what dialogue... they stare at each other throughout the movie)? The picture? The only thing I want to say is that, when the first one came out, I heard my best friend and my sister talk about it and they say it was an awesome movie. I decided to go watch it at the movies with both of them. Throughout the movie, I was waiting for something to happen. At the end, I said to myself "That's it? I paid $10 for this emotionless movie?" Disappointed you say? I was beyond that. What's worst then disappointed? If you know, tell me, because that's how I felt after the movie. I didn't want to be harsh to my sister and friend, so I said I liked it, because they were looking at me with sparks in their eyes after asking me "SOOOOO? DID YOU LIKE IT?!?!?!?" Now I'm honest... No, this movie was a waste of money and time.


1. Twilight
I wrote my reviews from the fifth place to the first one. After writing the second place... I thought that it deserved the first place too. Twilight is not a good movie and never will be. I have nothing against Twilight's fan or the books, but I did try to read the books... and I got to page 24. That's it. Not my kind of literature... and movie. 


(If there are mistakes in this post, sorry, it's 12:00 a.m., and I'm tired... but I had to share this!)

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